Jun 3, 2019         24505         2 Comments        

Many times and very often I take my time to think. I think about my life and think about life in general. I think about progress, success, dreams, relationships, ambition, relevance, participation, solutions, possibilities, problems, challenges, opposition, enemies the almighty God and the reason why I’m in this world at this time and in this place.

It’s a lot to think about especially if the intention is to find the correct answers not just assumptions, speculations and wishes.

Personal evaluation helps a lot in driving your life in the right direction and keeping you on track. When you evaluate yourself and your life frequently, you will retain a sense of charge and control over yourself and all you’re connected with and responsible for, and you will have a more objective and realistic views about events, developments, people and choices.

A recent discovery in my musing and thinking about life, humanity and real purpose is, many people are not growing, they are just changing. To adjust, to adapt, to change to vary and modify is not the same thing as growth.

It is possible for a matter, an object, a creature or person to take on new forms, new shapes, new molds and even new packaging but remain largely the same. An alteration in looks is not always growth. An alteration in thinking or mindset is not always growth. A new way of thinking or viewing issues may change your behaviours or attitude towards that thing, but this change in attitude may not necessarily be tantamount to real growth.

Every human being as long as you’ve got breath and you’re alive, you’re going through continuous and uninterrupted modification and changes in perceptions, perspectives, opinions and views about life.

A new way of viewing things, a fresh insight into something, a new opinion about something may not be a progressive way of seeing it, in fact it may even be a retrogressive or destructive perception. Not every new knowledge is good knowledge.

Many of us have passed judgements over things, people and situations based on how it served us at a time. As humans when we go through painful, disappointing situations and experiences, our conclusion and opinion are usually subjective and biased.

Many have concluded negatively and are now biased on some good initiatives with disappointing eventualities such as formal education as an automatic key for employment, love affairs and relationships that should lead to marriage, marriages that shouldn’t have ended in divorce, in-law matters and interference in otherwise a lovely marriage, financial investments that went really bad, partnerships in business that went sour, multi-level marketing schemes that crumbled suddenly, betrayal and trust issues with friends, colleagues, associates and even a spouse.

Negative experiences with and in all these can make anyone draw a biased conclusion hence, the person’s attitude, behaviours and responses in these matters would change which is not necessarily growth.

Dear friend, situations and experiences can change you, in fact they are changing you daily but are they growing you?

The difference between change and growth is in the outcomes and reward. Anything that grows you must be capable of bringing about a valuable recompense, result or reward in and from you. It must ultimately be gratifying and rewarding to all concerned.

Growth is becoming better, not bitter. Growth is about believe in possibilities not surrendering to obstacles and temporary setbacks.

Growth is learning and gaining strength through adversity, not falling flat and cowering in weakness, lamentation, blame game and fault finding.

Growth is objectivity and taking responsibility not subjectivity, bitterness and vendetta. Growth is becoming blessed and becoming a blessing, not remaining broke, unproductive, beggarly, helpless and inconsequential in life.

To grow is to react and respond positively to both the good and the bad in one’s life. To grow is to mature and take charge of things, people and situations. To grow is to develop self-control and self-mastery.

Many of us today remain unproductive, unhappy, discouraged, disillusioned and stagnant because we keep changing, modifying and remodifying ourselves without growing.

Many of us keep learning lessons from our experiences and challenges but not learning morals. Lessons can change or remake you, but only meaningful morals can truly grow you.

Dear friend, it is time to grow. It is time to become a superior version of yourself. It is time for self-mastery. To achieve this do the following today.

  1. Never complain, never explain when it’s not necessary, complaining hardly makes anything better and not everyone deserves your explanation, just take responsibility and do the right thing. Never allow people pressure you into doing things you’d regret afterwards. Be in charge of your life, stop living for people.
  2. Resolve in advance possible problems and crisis that could occur. Don’t wait till it’s too late and please refuse to be manipulated into doing the wrong by friends and/or loved ones.
  3. Take responsibility for everything you are and everything you will become. Let people be, forgive and let go, stop blaming everybody.
  4. Who made you angry or who is making you angry? Walk away from such a person, if you can’t, make excuses for the person and become liberated.
  5. Take responsibility for your financial situation, your health situation and family life. Do your job, do your bit, function effectively, do thy diligence, stop cashing in on the weaknesses of collaborators, employers, bosses, subordinates, partners or spouse. Do your part well and make room for weaknesses in others.

Dear friend, don’t just keep changing, it’s time to start growing. Develop a superior you.


  1. Emmanuel says:


  2. Jennifer Wayas says:

    Well done sir, I’m inspired

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